"I Was Trying to Let Him Down Easy..."

I am still getting through Gavin DeBecker's fantastic book, The Gift of Fear.

In my opinion it is a must-read for every college bound female (and all women in general, for that matter). One chapter that particularly resonated with me vis a vis this blog was Chapter 11, titled "I Was Trying To Let Him Down Easy."

My girlfriend is very attractive, and as such, when she goes out she garners much unwanted and unwelcome attention, especially from the douchebaggery-ensconced, Affliction shirt wearing, tanned, spikey haired strokejobs that frequent so many bars now. This clearly bothers her, however, she tells me that she does not tell them she's not interested because she doesn't want to come off as a "bitch."

Like it or not, people at some level care what other people think of them. That's just called being human. If a girl breaks up with a guy and he keeps pursuing her or if a guy has a crush on a girl and keeps pursuing her, in both cases the men think that this "persistence" will prove their love for them.

As DeBecker states in this chapter, "persistence only proves persistence-it does not prove love. The fact that a romantic pursuer is relentless doesn't mean you are special-it means he is troubled."

There is a right way and a wrong way to handle unwarranted attention or advances; regardless of how you handle attention, one safety mechanism should always be in place-the ability to protect yourself.

Go to www.whitecollarwarrior.com/Products.html right now and download the Course Volumes - and should you ever need to, you will thank God you did.

Be safe, and remember-nobody has the right to make you feel uncomfortable.

Bobby